Is there anyone out there who did not achieve all their goals they made at the beginning of last year? You can't see it, but I'm raising my hand up high. I kind of achieved some. Keywords being "kind of."
I want this year to be different. So, I did something I've never done before. And I want you to do this too.
I thought back to the time in my life were I was most happy. Can you think of a time where you were happiest? Is there a moment (or hopefully a period) of time in which you felt life was a s it should be?
Having a hard time thinking of something?
Just think of a wonderful thought! Any happy little thought?
I don't even have to try to come up with my happiest time in life. I think about it all the time. I compare it to everything. It's a problem.
So about 5 years ago I lived in Florida. I was working at Disney World, I had amazing friends, and I had just met a really special guy (spoiler alert: I married this guy). I was tan, fit, and happy.
I wanted to be a Disney Princess so I took very good care of myself. My eyebrows were always on point. Teeth were whitened. And I made sure I could dance and move.
I was super active in my church. I went to all the activities. I went to church every Sunday. And, I read my scriptures or listened to general conference talks everyday (that's a BIG deal for me). I wasn't perfect, but I was trying to live in a way I knew would bring much more happiness than how I had previously been living.
*FREEZE* I just want to make sure you've done the first step.
STEP 1: Think of the happiest time in your life. Bring back ALL the memories
Then, you're gonna get a pen and paper and do STEP 2: Write down all the reasons why this moment or memory is when you were happiest.
Now, some may say, as humans we have a tendency to romanticize the past. I don't want you to do that. So, here comes what I want you to do next.
STEP 3: Write down the not so perfect parts of this moment in your life.
I have a big long list for you! While I loved working for Disney, they sure didn't pay enough. I was always just scraping by when it came to finances. My house had a cockroach problem. And while both my roommates were nice, one of them was less than clean. And, thanks to paper thin walls, what he did in that room, and with who, came through to my room, crystal clear. Yup. True story.
My car, that was around 22 years old at the time, did not go in reverse. This one of two things; I needed to park on an incline so, when I was ready to leave I could put the car in reverse and push it out of the spot, or, that I needed to pull through whenever I parked. Also, this car leaked. I ended up duck taping all the edges ( I did it so well though, that no one ever noticed!).
I also got a ridiculous ticket, from a very grumpy cop.
I didn't have my dream job. And the new managers in my area were, well, managers. NOT leaders.
But, I was still SO happy. The good outweighed the bad. Life was great.
Once you've made both of your lists, and acknowledged the good AND the bad in in your happiest moments of life, you can go back to focusing on just the good stuff.
Some of the items on my list I can't recreate. I live in Utah, so working at Disney World is off the table. There aren't any real beaches in Utah either. And, my house is gross. There's no changing that.
But there were other things I could do right now, that I did back then.
I can put more effort into taking care of myself. That is not a bad thing. Self care is NOT bad. I repeat, self care is not bad. Putting a little more time into my skin care, and making sure I'm fit and feel good are good things!
Being more active and taking more walks is totally doable. I want my killer calves back!
I can create and cultivate a wardrobe that I love. And don't worry, I'll include you in this process. Modest clothing shopping can be frustrating. Am I right?
I can be way more involved in church. That's right Relief Society activities, I'm coming for you.
I can let myself be busy, in all the right ways. I can work towards my goals, and let them consume my time in a healthy positive way. I can make crafts all the time. I can try to beautify my house (we'll see).
I can put effort into spending time with my friends, and try to develop the relationships I've been blessed with.
Life can be better. I just have to work for it. And so these are my goals.
So, the next step, if you haven't figured it out, is this:
STEP 4: Make goals based on what made you happy in your memory.
Does that make sense? Say you used to make crafts all the time. Make a goal to do that again!
Or, if you always felt like you were on point look wise, create a new self care regime so help you feel great again.
It can be as big or as little as you want. But the goal f your goal is to get you feeling happy again.
If I can do it, you can do it. Even better, let's do it together, ok?